I don’t react well to “sweetie”. And surprisingly nor do many other Americans whom according to my online research, have had much to say about epithets. When dealing with terms of endearment, when if ever is “sweetie” appropriate and when does it cross that fine line between votive to simply being condescending?
Leave the baby talk at home.
There is no room for “sweethearts” in the corporate world. Regardless of whether an older person addresses a younger co-worker in such manner or vice versa, the address is both uncalled for and unprofessional. The simple word as innocently as it could be stated, is a condescending tone that has no place in the work force. As working professionals do, they pride themselves in their work and in their accomplishments. The simple address can make any professional feel undermined, disrespected and in cases be reason enough to have you visiting your employers HR office.
You’re a stranger. Keep it that way.
Americans are huge about personal space. So it would make sense that they would also be particular about their personal relationships. When at a restaurant an addressed by your server as “sweetheart”, it’s understandable that you can feel as if you’re being babied. The atmosphere screams baby talk- you sitting on a low chair, your server looking down at you asking you if you’d like whipped cream on your hot chocolate or your eggs scrambled or over easy- this situation is all too reminiscent of your early childhood when mommy weighed on you hand and foot. The baby talk is also uncalled for in this situation specially if your server is a second away from putting a bib on you and pinching your cheeks. Tip to servers: baby talk is cheap. And so will I be if the nonsense continues. The sweet talk won’t get you a bigger tip nor will it grant you a new set of friends. Instead, stick with the “ma’ams”, “sirs”, “ladies” and such. Not only will you come off friendlier but it might also get your patrons to slip you chunkier green.
Earn your right to call me “Sweetheart”.
Aaagh…the dating scene. The straightforward, buy-me-dinner-and-ill-suck-your-face dating scene. It’s a cold place out there, but it can get even colder if you address the wrong person as a “sweetheart”. Calling a person “sweetheart” without being punched in the face shows that you’ve earned your rights to do so. It means that you’ve put up with PMS-ing days, picked up the dry cleaning and took out the trash without being asked to do so. But if you want to avoid being battered or dumped after calling your date a “sweetheart”, try putting up with some of their issues before you pry yourself worthy of calling them out of their name.
Lost in Translation
Many people use “sweetie” and other pet names when addressing a perfect stranger. With or without realizing it, the term (or terms) can actually cause more harm than good. At work, at a restaurant or on a date, being addressed as “sweetie” can catch you off guard. The term itself is as innocent as is splurging on a $5 pizza, but the social incorrectness of the address is what sends people up the roof. Rather than walking on eggshells in fear of a brutal beat down, familiarize yourself with other salutations that will neither get you fired nor get the air socked out of you.
P.S. I am not your sweetheart.
